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Writer's pictureJide Ijietemi Jetson

#4 Emotional Help in Stressful Times

There are times in our lives that some seasons are more stressful than others, depending on

whatever one is going through in life. This past year has been such a season in my life as a

husband, father, pastor and a leader at work. A big and unexpected change as a husband coupled with the stress of been a father of a physically, mentally and emotionally challenged daughter. At the same time coping with life and leading other at work on top of pastoring a Church. Spiritually leading and nurturing people through their own challenges could take its toll. It was a challenging year physically, emotionally and spiritually but in all, God has proven to be faithful in every step of the way.


Regardless of how much emotional and spiritual reserves one may think they have before a

challenge in life, a stressful period will deplete your emotional and spiritual tank a little each day, like letting the air out of a tire. Apostle Paul in Romans twelve and verse twelve says in the message Bible and I paraphrase it like “Don’t burn out; keep yourselves fuelled and aflame”. How do you keep yourself fuelled and emotionally healthy during stressful seasons? Here are actions or steps that I found useful to prevent burnout:


Keep been gracious to yourself and others. (James 4.6)

Treat yourself and others how God treats you, and that is with grace, mercy, and forgiveness.

Whatever has happened that brought you in such state, (a) seek God’s forgiveness and grace, (b) accept His forgiveness and allow His grace to be sufficient for you. God always gives us what we need, not what we deserve. During such times, we need extra grace. So, I made sure I was kind to myself, understanding that at such times, I cannot perform at the same level was before the crisis period. You’re likely exhausted as I was many times, my mind was tired, and my strength failed me as the crises prolonged.


Start and end each day refuelling your soul. (James 1.21)

David said in Psalm one hundred and nineteen and verse one hundred and forty-seven “I rise

before the dawning of the morning, and cry for help; I hope in Your Word”. When you’re looking for hope, you need time in God’s Word and in His presence. I have learnt that the attitude one has for the entire day is set during the first few minutes of your morning. So, during my crises, one way to keep me from burning out is to put my Bible open and seek Gods face for instructions and reflect on it, keep yourself in-tuned until you hear Him speak to you, this could be from the scripture you are reading or by sensing His voice inside your spirit man.


Set and stick to a routine. (Ephesians 5.15-16) 

Study has shown that predictability is an important stress reducer, especially when everything is changing in your life. A routine gives you the stability you need to help you refuel your tank.

Putting together a new routine when you’re going through a difficult season may take some

creativity, but it will be worth the effort.


Reduce your media consumption. (Matthew 6.22-23) 

It’s has become a natural thing in the world we live now to spend extra time scrolling through

social media when you feel overwhelmed. But if you fill your mind with constant images of

negativity, you’ll only raise your stress level. So, cut our the negative because it wont help you and as one person puts it “you will become what you allow into your mind”. I like this phrase that says, “garbage in, garbage out.” Your computer can only give you the data you put into it. The same is true with our minds. A stressful period is a great time to build new routines, meditating on the Word could be a rewarding routine but never media consumption.


Connect with the people you love. (1 Thessalonians 5.11)

This is one of the most meaningful things that helped me during my difficult season, listen

carefully to people I truly love. They were extremely great in making me feel loved and not

abandoned, always by my side even though one is going through her own crises, we became each other’s comforter (glory to God). It doesn’t take long to lift someone’s spirit, I realised, but it does need to be intentional. So, we intentionally reach out to one another and share or comfort each other and tell each other we are in it together, no matter what.


Share your feelings. (Galatians 6:2)

Feelings are meant to be felt not kept on the inside; you have emotions during these stressful

periods because you’re made in the image of God. They are neither good nor bad. They are

simply emotions. Apostle Paul gives us a great example of sharing our feelings instead of stuffing them in second Corinthians chapter one and in verse eight, when he writes, “We think you ought to know, dear brothers and sisters about the trouble we went through in the province of Asia. We were crushed and overwhelmed beyond our ability to endure, and we thought we would never live through it” (NLT). Sharing your feelings leads to health. It’s crucial during a crisis or stressful time.


Seek advice before making major decisions. (Proverbs 15.22)

When you’re under stress, your brain power drops to lower levels. You’re never thinking your

best when you’re under constant stress (think hard about that!). You simply can’t access the

smartest part of your brain during these tough periods. You’re much more likely to make bad

decisions nine and a half out of ten times. That’s why it’s wise to check with others when you’re

making major decisions while under stress. 


Schedule renewal breaks. (Isaiah 40.30-31)

Science has showing us that it’s much better to take multiple short breaks throughout the day

rather than one long one. Your productivity will increase if you take five-minute breaks

throughout your day. We are told that when we are in crises, we should find something doing so our minds will not think, so to say. That is true to a certain extent, but while working or going through the daily activities, take few minutes to recharge, I come to realise that I need multiple breaks to recharge emotionally, physically, and spiritually. It isn’t much different than what you do with medicine. For example, you don’t usually take one large pill when you’re sick. Instead, you take smaller pills two or three times a day.


Serve someone struggling more than you. (Proverbs 11.25)

During this time, my focus was on a person who needs me more, and by the grace of God, I

choose to give her my full attention for her full recovery. No matter how much you’re struggling right now, someone always has it worse. For your own mental and emotional health, you need to get the attention off yourself and onto someone else’s pain. You need to give back and recognize that life doesn’t revolve around you.


Control what’s controllable, and trust God for the rest. (James 2.22)

God is active in our mental, spiritual, and emotional health. He wants you to make wise choices based on His guidance from the Bible and through prayer and fellowship with Him. And then, when you encounter something out of your control, you can surrender it to God and trust Him to work it out for good. I am in no way saying we must put all the responsibility on God. On the other hand, you can act like God doesn’t play a part in your life and assume everything depends on you. Find a balance that helps you recognize what’s in your control and then make wise decisions. You can’t control the circumstances of life, but you can choose how you will respond to it and that will make all the difference. God is always there to help you make that choice.

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